In this section I give my impressions of what goes on regarding dance with Middle Eastern people which is mostly gleaned from the numerous gatherings and functions that I have attended here in England. I can add my experiences I had in Africa into the mix but I am not going to pretend to cover such a general topic in any sort of comprehensive way, all that I am going to do is to explore what I believe is the main aspect. 

Yes its true a lot of informal dancing does take place at any sort of gathering of Middle Eastern people. Most probably more than at Western gatherings though if you compare "like for like" at every English wedding you will nearly always have the disco at the end. 

The main difference is the way the dance is done. In order to understand this more we have to look at the entire mentality or character of the 2 sets of people and it is this difference that shapes how the dancing is done. 

As a global generalization, both religion and family ties figure far more prominently with Middle Eastern people than with Westerners. Probably the family ties bit more than the religion. The overall impression I get that the bonds and links within the families are far more dominant and individualism is far less so. In Africa I was taken to this traditional festival by the younger brother of Lola. Lola was my main contact in Africa. The younger brother was a handsome young man, well educated and spoken. I asked him if he minded taking me to the festival. He said that his brother told him to do so. I asked him a question which he simply could not comprehend, I asked him something along the lines if he minded being told by his older brother what to do. There was this long and interesting conversation, but the type where you can immediately tell that both parties are on completely different wavelengths. The gist that I got was that he was completely happy being ordered about by his older brother, he would not want anything or couldn't even comprehend anything otherwise. The loss of freedom is more than made up by the tight bonding, stability and mutual support and the "carefree" way it is possible to live. If most things you do are dictated by religion, customs and family how wonderfully stress free that must be! 

It seems to me that as a Middle Eastern person you are indeed hemmed in by Islam, your culture and dictates of your family and the younger you are, the more you will be told what to do. But what a marvelous Prison! Such a rich culture and heritage, unconditional love from all of your family, and such a strong sense of identity and sense of personal self worth. You don't have to prove or show anything, you are part of the Family, you are a Muslim and you are an Egyptian or whatever. You can relax as you are, you don't have to try or prove your personal worth, or anything at all. You can be as you are and from that strong standpoint you can work. 

But here in the West we have to work hard and prove and pay for everything along the way. We are driven to even have to pay for someone to listen to our concerns and worries. We have to map out complex schedules and appointments simply to have a bit of time with friends. The individual is King, but should you stumble and fall, no society, culture or family usually is able to help you up. A way of life that is becoming so complex and overwhelming in terms of choice and pace of change that stress related illnesses are epidemic now. 

Now all this may help to explain the vast difference in the dance done in an informal way with Middle Eastern people as opposed to Western people. 

The Middle Eastern people would do a small portfolio of moves that are the hallmark of the particular Ethnic grouping they are from. They do the moves with Pride, knowing that these moves belong to them, reflects that they are part of this group and will carry on belonging, it is their Birthright and they are proud of it. 
The children learn the moves from the parents and don't Jazz them up or water them down. They celebrate their bonds with each other and openly express the tightness that exists between them. They express that they are glad to be with each other and nothing can alter that. They don't have to try or need to "show off." They are accepted with each other anyway. 

But just look at a typical Western gathering. Loads of people all doing "their own thing," all trying really hard. There is no sense of doing moves to bond with your fellow dancers. If anything you do things to attract attention and be different. That's not to say its like that at all times, you can get a sense of a real "tribal" buzz at a rave or particularly if a group of people really hit it off with each other. But as a huge generalization people at Western gatherings tend to be more self conscious, into how they appear, and don't exhibit through their dancing the same level of culture, sense of belonging to a group or uniting with each other. 

The next huge difference is that always the men and women dance separately and in more stricter quarters they would have to be physically separate in addition. In addition the type of dancing is also completely different whereas at Western gatherings men and women do not move substantially very differently to each other. 

As I have mentioned in "Introduction" because of the extended large families, far greater connections generally and greater religious adherences by people, a Middle Eastern person would be invited to far more weddings, birthdays and ceremonies to do with Islam such as the circumcision ceremonies and the ending of Ramadan. In fact to the extent that it would be possible to go to such a function every weekend if one wished. That isn't true for Westerners. Yes if one had enough contacts one may well be invited to a "barbie" (barbeque) every weekend, but its not the same as being part of this integrated network which one would be birth righted into rather than have to generate enough contacts and work hard at getting invited here there and everywhere. 

At these events there would be this overwhelming sense of purpose, to celebrate and to unite. You don't get that at a barbeque. 

Now I am not saying that everything in the Middle East is perfect and in the West it is not, nor do I relish becoming a Muslim woman and belonging to an extended family. But it doesn't stop me seeing that there is a lot that we Westerners need to learn and acquire by way of new habits and also we are advised to try and understand the Muslim, Middle Eastern perspective on life more, if we don't we are going to lose out.